Tenerife (Santa Cruz de Tenerife)

Ascending Mount Teide, Spain's volcanic poster child and highest peak, is like stepping onto the surface of Mars-but with better snacks. Nestled in the rugged heart of Tenerife, Teide National Park is a UNESCO-blessed playground of otherworldly rock formations, lunar-like landscapes, and sweeping vistas that stretch out arrogantly beneath the azure sky. Aim for dawn or sunset, when Teide's needle-sharp shadows cut dramatically across rust-colored valleys and lava fields glow like embers in the twilight. Book your cable-car ticket at least a month ahead unless you relish the agony of crowded disappointment, and budget roughly €40 for the ride-or pocket that cash, lace up some sturdy boots, and trek bravely upward, earning your post-hike cerveza the sweatier way. Pack layers, sunscreen, water, and snacks, because while the volcanic panoramas are breathtaking, they sadly don't include churro carts. Above all, embrace this lunar pilgrimage not just for the Instagram-worthy views but for the joy of casually dropping into future conversations the glorious absurdity of having spent an afternoon wandering atop Spain's fiery geological tantrum.

If ever there was a place where nature seems to be shamelessly showing off, it's Tenerife's Masca Valley-a Jurassic Park-meets-Game of Thrones sort of destination, minus the dinosaurs and dragons (although after tackling that terrain, you'll wish dragons were around for the ride back). The locals swear pirates once lurked here, hiding treasures and undoubtedly drinking copious amounts of rum in clandestine caves, which at least partially explains the gorge's rebellious charm. Begin your trek early-trust me, sunrise in Masca is worth the caffeine deficiency-and pack sturdy soles, ample water, and snacks robust enough to silence your hiking partner's complaints three kilometers in. Budget around €20 for shuttle and boat transfers if you care to spare your knees on the way uphill, and book at least a few days in advance-you aren't the only one chasing Instagram envy here. Sure, your thighs might curse you for days, but the bragging rights and that exquisite cocktail of beauty, adventure, and mild regret make hiking Masca Gorge more than worth it-if only to casually drop the phrase "pirate-infested ravine in the Canaries" at your next dinner party.

If your idea of a good time involves squeezing yourself down the throat of a volcano, then Cueva del Viento is hands-down the subterranean thrill you didn't know you needed. Nestled unassumingly near the quaint town of Icod de los Vinos-best known for its ancient Dragon Tree and surreally drinkable local vino-this sprawling lava labyrinth stretches beneath Tenerife's comfortable surface like a spilled bowl of obsidian spaghetti; it's one of the planet's longest volcanic tubes, carved out by a fiery tantrum from Mount Teide over 27,000 years ago. Book your subterranean date at least a week ahead-guided tours are non-negotiable-and aim to descend in the cool early morning, when hangovers are still gently throbbing and crowds haven't fully emerged. A budget of around twenty euros will secure your passage into this geological wonderland, along with some obligatory nerdy headgear, but don't forget sturdy shoes, a jacket (expect bone-deep chill), and, above all, a willingness to crawl through dusty darkness while pondering existential questions by flashlight. Is it worth it? Absolutely-there's nothing quite like casually dropping into future conversations that you've spent an afternoon tunneling through Mother Earth's volcanic plumbing, and lived to toast it afterward.